What happens when the thing that gave your life structure and meaning is suddenly gone?

The Nearness of You

October 5, 2026

Something changes in your life. You lose someone you love. Maybe your nest is empty for the first time. You retire and no longer see coworkers every day. In my case, I’m a widow. You feel disconnected. Isolated. I’ve read that loneliness is an epidemic. When I look on social media, I see a lot of folks looking for their peeps.

What’s the answer?

I’m considering the idea of proximity today. How do I meet new people and make new friends? One way is to become a regular somewhere. Remember the TV show “Cheers” where everybody knows your name? That’s the idea.

Now, the investigating begins. Where can I go to meet people with whom I have something in common?

I’ve tried going to a local coffee shop. I love their pastries, but it doesn’t seem to attract people who want to sit over their snack and possibly converse. I do frequent a social club where I am known and recognized, but the relationships don’t extend beyond that building.

What about organizations? I’m surrounded by women in most of the activities I do. Where do men hang out, I wonder? I’m not into sports. Not even pickleball. What else is there?

Here’s my current list: a fraternal organization, a veterans’ organization, a business organization. Will any of them be the missing puzzle piece?